Why do we laugh? It usually involves tragedy plus time. Many
years ago I managed to get totally drunk at a party. I seldom drink for
two Scotches and I am smashed. When we went to bed I fancied myself a
"World Class Swordsman". Ha! I was a World Class Failure.
I felt humiliated. It surely was not funny then. For years after
this disaster we laughed about it.
Years ago I had the pleasure of meeting George Burns. I mentioned
that most of the comics were Jews. George replied, "We Jews would have
never survived without being able to laugh at anything. I think we
invented 'Gallows Humor'."
To illustrate he told this story:
Harry and Frank were bound to the
firing squad wall. The Arab commander asked if they had any last words.
Harry shouted, "You are all a bunch of raghead S.O.B.s". Frank
nudged him whispering, "For God's sake Harry, don't make waves!".
If you can't remember the last time you laughed, it doesn't mean you can't.
It may indicate that your life has been stressful, or that everyday challenges
seem overwhelming. In any event, you might be convinced that laughter is great
for those happy moments when smiling doesn't take an effort. For the
pressured times, who can laugh anyway? Frankly you might be surprised.
For many, laughter is a powerful healing elixir, or better yet ... natural
Prozac. It enables us to reframe our worries and it has extraordinary capacity
to help us reestablish a positive and healthy perspective when we're down.
Yet even more amazing is the fact that some of the best jokes are based
on true-to-life stories about things that actually happen to ordinary people.
Some of the most famous comedians who ever lived developed their materials
through one phenomenal talent. They progressively honed their awareness of
what was really happening around them. Through such observations, they were
able to surgically extract a light-hearted perspective even in the darkest of
times.
Yet if it is true that some of the best jokes are based on real
occurrences, why aren't we all laughing?
The answer tells us a lot about ourselves. Essentially there are two
basic reasons. The first is that no two perspectives are necessarily alike.
Some people naturally discover the light-hearted side of things while
others seem to settle into a "doom and gloom" mode about practically
everything that occurs in their lives.
The second reason is based upon what few of us ever really want to face -
self-reflection and self-image. After all, some of what we do and what happens
to us must be very funny! Obviously the comedians think so. The bottom
line here is straight-forward. Can you laugh at yourself in a positive
way?
So why aren't we laughing?
This answer is simple: because we want to
be seen as "perfect!" And when we "mess up," we don't want anyone to notice
those ridiculous things we do, or the silly situations we somehow create for
ourselves. Yet "to err is human." Change just 2 letters and what
we have is "to err is humor!"
Isn't it surprising that the words, "human" and "humor" are so alike? Maybe
our ancestors knew something we as a society need to relearn. Simply
stated, none of us are perfect.
Frankly I believe the quest for perfection has profound physiological
effects like wrinkling of the forehead and a strong gravitational pull on the
mouth muscles. I'm also convinced that when we discover the "sense of
humor" areas of the human brain, they're likely to be atrophied in those who
take everything so seriously - only kidding! I'd hate to be the
researcher searching for those regions in some of the people I know.
I suppose we all know those people. In fact, we are those people a
good part of the time. The most important question we face is "how to turn
that frown upside down?"
The process requires 7 simple steps.
1.Give yourself permission to laugh at yourself.
2.Rediscover your sense of humor by easing off your drive for perfection
and seriousness while encouraging a light-hearted approach whenever possible.
3.Stimulate your mind to uncover the humor in every situation and give your
laughter muscles a daily workout.
4.Allow laughter to replace alcohol, tobacco, drugs and medications when
you're stressed and need to cope.
5.Encourage your playful side to emerge even during those challenging
times.
6.Accept every funny happenstance as a gift to be shared. When you
laugh, especially at yourself, everyone else will join in. Laughter is
nothing less than contagious - and healing.
7.Don't take yourself or anyone else too seriously.
There is a fundamental body of medical evidence that shows laughter's
positive effects on the immune system. It has also been recently established
that future health outcomes are enhanced by "the glass that's half full" as
opposed to "the glass that's half empty." The same rationale likely
holds true for those who laugh. Someday, I'm sure we'll find what a
great philosopher once said, "he who laughs ... lasts""
